Chapter 3

I walk in the front door and wave to Chris, a smile on my lips. I move to the stairs and set my stuff down. I look up in surprise as I hear voices drifting out of the kitchen. I walk closer, and my heart sinks as I hear two distinctive male voices and my sister’s higher, flirty voice.

I muster up another smile and walk into the kitchen. The talking stops and three pairs of eyes turn to me. My face flushes and I am at a total loss for words. Luckily, Amber jumps from the lap of the guy, Ashton I’m guessing, and grabbed my arm.

“Ashton, Edwin… this is my beautiful twin Hazel.” Amber says smoothly.

I swallow my sudden nerves; usually I was perfectly fine talking to any guy that decided to approach me.

Edwin stands and holds his hand out for mine. “It is a pleasure to finally meet you.”

I put my hand in his and, like a true gentleman, he bends and touches his lips gently to the back of my hand.

I blush again and stammer, “N…Nice to meet you too...”

Dang, what is my problem today? I think to myself. I take a deep breath and calm myself. My sister had been right. Both Ashton and Edwin were extremely good looking. Somehow, they seemed older and much more mature then only 17. Maybe that’s what is throwing me…I reasoned.

“I hope my sister has been kind to you both.” I say sweetly, turning on my charm. Hey, I my as well have fun with this.

“Oh, she most definitely has!” Edwin assures me.

“Has she shown you the house yet…?” I ask.

“No…” He says taking a step closer to me. Suddenly I was conscious of the fact that he never let go of my hand. I grasp his hand tighter and lead him out of the kitchen to the stairs. I barely notice the smug look on my sister’s face as we leave.

“I’ll show you my room first… But be warned, it’s a little messy since all of my sister’s stuff was moved in.” I say, making a right at the top of the stairs and leading him to the door at the end of the hallway.

I open the door and he gestures for me to go ahead of him. I walk over and sit on my bed. He looks around, genuine interest on his face. He glances my way and I smile invitingly. I pat the bed next to me.

He comes over and sits down, sifting uncomfortable. I move away, disinterested if he was going to be uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry… it’s just, I don’t know you.” Edwin mumbles, playing with his hands.

“I was moving too fast. We’ll slow down.” I smile sweetly, toning down my flintiness.

“Well, I would like to get to know you,” He said in a sweet voice still playing with his friends.
“I would like to get to know you too,” Saying in a nice voice.
He gets up, “Would you like to go for a walk? We can get to know each other?”
“Sure,” I say and smile again.
He takes my hand and I stand up. We walk down the stairs and I hear my sister giggling again. I glance around the corner and see them really close. She is once again in his lap and she is looking into his eyes. I feel a tug from Edwin and he opens the door for me. He lets me walk out first and then closes the door behind him. We walk hand and hand down the neighborhood.
“If I may ask, did you have a boyfriend before the…” His voice trails. I can tell he is uncomfortable with this too.
“No, I did not. Did you have a girlfriend?” I ask back.
“No, I did not. I was more focused on my studies at my school.” I blink twice. I have never heard a guy say that in my life.
“I assume guys around here are not,” He says breaking the silence.
“Not at all, actually,” I say and almost tell him that I have never heard what he had just said, but I decided against it. I figure that would be mean.
“Well, I guess I will have to learn the American way if I am to fit in.”
I nod in agreement. We walk in silence for some time. I start to get bored.
“So, um do you have any really good friends back at home?” I ask, trying to get ride of the boringness.
“Well, I had a few, but no one really close. How about you?”
“Just Claire, you will see her soon enough tomorrow.”
We turn the corner to a playground. I see a bench and lead him to it. We both sit down.
“Well, Hazel you are a beautiful young lady,” He says in a nice voice.
“Thank you and you are a…” I trail off, trying to find some complement to say. He turns to look at me
“You are a nice polite young man,” I say, finally finding the right woods. I look up at him.
Our eyes meet and he smiles. His blue eyes sparkle, but they do not move me. Maybe they will sooner or later.
“You have beautiful violet eyes,” He says. I hold back a blush and swallow.
“Thank you,” I say again and smile.
I stare down at our hands that are still intertwined.
Suddenly I hear a car pull up, stop and a door open.
“Hazel?” An entirely too familiar voice called.
I glance up sheepishly and see Chris walking towards Edwin and I. Edwin glances between the angry look on Chris’ face and the shocked look on mine. I stand up and walk towards Chris, taking a deep breath as I go.
“Who’s he?” Chris asks angrily when I’m close enough. “You said you didn’t have a boyfriend.”
“I know, and when I said that I didn’t. Well not really I guess…” I say, grasping at something to explain it. “We… uh Edwin and I-“
“Edwin?” Chris laughs. “What is he, British?”
“Yes. He is.” I say through gritted teeth. The smile falls from Chris’ face. “And we we’re together this summer, but I didn’t know until I got home today he was going to come and stay with us.”
“Oh…” Chris looks down at his feet. “I just thought we… kind of… had something…?”
“I know… but like, it’s complicated Chris… and I didn’t ask for this… you’ve got to understand.” I say quietly taking a step closer, not wanting Edwin to hear me.
“Yeah, I get it Hazel. See you at school tomorrow.” He says disgustedly.
I stand there and watch him walk away from me. I can’t explain the feelings I’m having… I desperately didn’t want Chris to walk out of my life, but I could feel Edwin’s eyes on me again. I sigh in defeat, fake a smile and walk back to where Edwin is still sitting.
“Everything alright?” He asks.
I nod once and smile up at him. “Just a small misunderstanding… He’ll get over it.”
“Good.” Edwin says smiling, pats my leg once and stands. “We should be heading home. You’re parents promised dinner at 5, and I’d like to see if I could be of any help.”
“Yeah… Okay.” I say, standing as well. He takes my hand and we start the short distance back to my house.
I couldn’t believe we hadn’t even kissed…I thought to myself as we walk. Any other guy I would have definitely made out with already…
After some time of walking I start to get angry.
“Hey, Edwin?” I stop walking and stand very close to him. I am testing him to see what he will do. This may turn out to be a totally failure, but someone has to make a move.
He comes closer. I smile and lean in and he leans in too. We stare into each other’s eyes and he kisses me on the cheek. I pretend to be pleased with just a peck on the cheek but I am not. I wonder what Chris would do. Would he be the one to kiss me? He would probably be more moving than this. Now he may never talk to me again. A frown forms on my lips.
“Are you alright Hazel?” Asks Edwin in concern.
I hide my frown and smile, “Yes I am great.”
I swallow hard and we keep walking until we get to my house. We walk in to the booming voice of laughing people. I hear a guy telling a story and everyone else laughing.
“My cousin has always been the funny type,” says Edwin in with a bit of laughter in his voice.
We walk into the kitchen and he lets go of my hand.
“May I be of any help getting dinner ready?” Asks Edwin in his politest voice.
“Why sure Edwin, that would be great,” answers my mother.Edwin walks over to my mom, and I walk into the living room. My sister is now sitting next to Ashton instead of on him and my dad is sitting on the other couch.
“Hey sista! You have fun with Edwin?” My sister says in a really happy voice.
I nod and take the seat next to my dad.
“Ashton was just telling us some stories of his life back home,” My dad says.
“He is very funny,” My sister says and smiles at him. “So Edwin and I were walking in the park and a squirrel comes out right in front of us. I get my cousin to try to feed the squirrel…”
I loose my focus on him and look into the kitchen. Edwin is helping my mom make dinner by cutting carrots. He notices me looking at him and he looks back at me. He grins and nods. I grin and nod back. He looks away and continues his cutting.
I once again think about what Chris would do. I push the ideas out of my head. There is nothing I can do to make things any different.
“Hazel…” I hear my sister say. I snap out of it to see everyone in the kitchen.
“Hmm?” I say and try to fake a smile.
“It is dinner time silly,” She says and giggles.
“oh ya,” I say and get up.
I come to the dinner table where my dad is sitting across from my mom, my sister is sitting across from Ashton, and the seat across from Edwin is open. Edwin stands up and pulls out my chair.
“Thank you,” I say and sit down.

Dinner seems to drag on. I feel as if I am glancing at the clock every three minutes.

“Hazel, hunny?” I hear my mom ask.

“Yeah?” I say glancing up, my fork paused in midair.

“Are you alright? You seem a little out of it tonight.” She says with a look of concern on her face.

“Yeah, I’m just… just tired is all.” I say, putting my fork back down. “May I be excused early?”
My mother nods. I feel slightly bad about leaving Edwin, but I figure he can handle it. Everyone is watching me as I stand. Edwin stands slightly when I do, which I assume is customary when your “lady” leaves the table but I could be wrong.

I take my dishes to the counter and then make my way upstairs. I need to clear my head, so I grabbed my favorite pjs and went to the bathroom. I turned on the shower and waited half a second before jumping into the scalding water. I let out a sigh of relief as the water caresses my body.

I take my time in the shower, letting all the days hardships float away from me. Soon, however, the water runs cold and I am forced to get out. I put my hair in a wet ponytail and get into my pajamas, I made my way back down the hall towards my room. I paused at the top of the stairs. Laughter made its way up to me and I felt a stab of loneliness. I wanted to be part of them, but… to be with Edwin… it was nice but a little stiff.

I shook my head and went to my room, closing the door behind me. I walk over to my iPod and shuffle through, settling on some Coldplay. I grab my current novel of choice and flop down on my full size bed. With my iPod playing, I couldn’t hear what was going on below me, but I was sure that in a few hours Amber would fill me in. I wasn’t sure I was quite ready to hear how amazing Ashton was though.

Then a thought hit me… _Edwin and Ashton will be at school tomorrow…_ I groan inwardly and hit my bed. Tomorrow would be just a joy…

“Hazel?” A voice came from the other side of my door, followed by a knock.

“Yeah?” I call out. “Come in.”

The door opens and Edwin is standing in my doorway. He takes one look at me and immediately looks away, a blush creeping up his neck.

“It’s okay for you to look at me…” I say slowly. Cautiously he returns his eyes to mine, locking them there and never faltering from them. “You can sit”

He sits gingerly on the edge of my bed, looking totally uncomfortable.

“Hazel, I just came in to say goodnight…” He says, looking in my eyes again.

“Oh…” I say, disappointed. “Okay.”

Edwin stands and comes over to me. He leans over me and kisses me on my forehead. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

I sit there, shocked. _What was I? A child?!_ I watch as Edwin leaves, closing the door behind him. Not a minute later, the door reopens and Amber walks in with a smug look on her face.

“Spill” I say, sighing.

“He is an *amazing* kisser!” Amber says, flopping down on my bed next to me. “Ew, what are we listening to?!”

She stands back up and disconnects my iPod, then reconnects hers and turns on some rap. I groan but she doesn’t seem to notice.

Sitting back on the bed she asks, “How’s Edwin?”

“A prude.” I say simply.

“Ouch…” She says, totally sympathetic.

“Fer sure…” I say, shrugging to show her it didn’t matter.

“Hey, do you need a ride tomorrow? Because I’m taking Edwin and Ashton… so if you wanted you could hop a ride.” She says kindly.

“Oh… yeah sure. Thanks.” I say, slightly taken aback.

Amber shrugs and jumps up to go to her pile of clothes. While she changes I scoot to the far side of the bed and get under the covers.

“Night.” I say as I turn towards the wall. A silent tear rolls down my check as I think about what Chris would have done differently compared to what Edwin did tonight.

The next morning I get up to Amber’s alarm, which is set 15 minutes earlier then mine usually was. Thankfully I had showered the night before, since Amber and the two boys are now fighting over the bathroom. I use the time to pick out my favorite blue blouse and steal one of Amber’s skirts.

I walk down stairs, a surprising bounce in my step. I grab a bagel from the fridge and the cream cheese. I am just finishing my bagel as Amber and the boys come downstairs.

“Is that my skirt?” She says, not entirely mad just kind of shocked. I only rarely borrowed her stuff and that was to dress up for a boy.

“Yeah, I was going to ask you, but you were in the shower still…” I say sheepishly. “You’re not mad are you?”

“Nah.” She shrugs. “Ready boys?”

With that, she turns on her heel and heads for the garage door.

“You look lovely today Hazel,” Edwin says with a smile, but he avoids looking at me.
“Thank you,” I say nicely, hiding some of my annoyance.
We walk out to the garage and he opens passenger door for me. I get in and both Edwin Ashton get in the back.
“Let’s go,” Amber says with a smile.
She turns on some rap music and cranks it up. I look at Edwin and Ashton who are both kind of wincing. I bet they hate rap.
We reach school and Edwin opens the door for me. Walking into school we turn heads. We all walk in hand -hand. Girls start to look at us in envy. Amber just grins like a kid in a candy store. I just fake a smile, until I see Chris in the distance. I frown to the look on his face. It is the face of extreme defeat. We walk into the office and the boys get there schedules. Edwin is in my lunch and my last hour. Thank goodness he is not in my first or second hour. There lockers are, however right next to Amber and I’s.
“I will walk you to your first hour Hazel,” Edwin says.
“O ok,” I say and swallow hard.
“See ya later sista,” I say to my sister who I completely lost in Ashton’s eyes.
“Ya sure,” She says, not leaving Ashton’s eyes.
Edwin takes my hand walks me to my class and I walk with my head down. I can’t stand the look on Chris’s face. It is horrible. The whole walk is full of silence.
“Goodbye Hazel,” He says when we reach my class.
“Bye,” I say and look into his eyes.
He looks for a moment than walks away. I walk in my classroom once again annoyed. Chris is already in class and sitting in the back. I take a seat in the middle, fearing he will not want to be anywhere near me. Setting my stuff down I walk to him. He forces himself not to look at me.
“What do you want?” He growls.
“I wanted to say I am sorry. I really did not want things to happen the way they did.”
“How is that possible? You could have said no to him.”
“It is much more complicated than that.”
“Well than explain,” He raises his voice and looks up at me. There is anger in his eyes.
“I can’t…” I trail off as a tears start to fill my eyes.
“Well than there is nothing left for you to say. Just leave me alone, I would rather be anywhere than here talking to a liar like you.”
The last words sting hard and a tear rolls down my cheek. He notices and his face softens.
I quickly walk up to the teacher, “Can I please go use the bathroom?”
“Sure,” my teacher says.
I run out of the room.
“Hazel!” I hear from behind me.
I stop in my tracks and turn to see Chris standing there.
“You have me so confused,” he says in a calm voice, “At first it seemed like you liked me and the next minute I see you with another guy. Now you tell me you didn’t want to be with him, but you yet you still are. You cried and ran away after what I said and I don’t blame you it was harsh and I am sorry. I just have this feeling your hiding something. Will you please tell me what it is?”
“I…” I start and he walks closer to me.
I wipe away my tears and try to say it again.
“I have a… arranged marriage….” I say and run away.
I don’t want to hear his answer. I know it will be bad so I run. I run right into the safety zone, the girl’s bathroom. There I look at my self in the mirror. My make- up is all smeared. More tears roll down my face as reality hits. Why did I just tell him? He may spread it all over the school. Well he wanted the truth and he got it. The sad truth that I am forced into a marriage to a guy that is so boring he makes watching paint dry exciting.
“Hazel!” A male voice calls from the door way. _He can’t seriously have followed me, can he? Did he hear what I even said?!_

I take three deep breaths and wipe away the black smudges under my eyes. I push myself away from the sink I had been gripping and walk back out to where Chris was waiting.

“Are you serious?” He asks quietly.

“Yes…” I answer in a small voice. Tears spring to my eyes again. _And I thought today would be a *good* day?_

Without another word Chris takes a step closer to me. He wipes a stray tear and then pulls me into him. I have no idea how long we stand there, him holding me, but to soon he pulls away. I look at him, the question in my eyes meeting the determination in his.

“Well, looks like first period is almost over… We’ll go back… then we are leaving. You need a day off.” He tells me. There is a tinge of authority in his voice that I can’t bring myself to tell him I can’t do it. I have never skipped school a day in my life.

All I can do is nod once and then let him guide me by my hand back to class. The teacher gave us a stern look, but because my eyes were still all blotchy, she let us slide. I can’t focus on anything the rest of the hour other then what I was about to do next hour, and with who.

When the bell rings, Chris came up behind me and whispers in my ear, “I’m in the back lot. See you there in 10.”

Claire shoots me a look, but I pretend not to notice, instead going straight to my locker and putting my books away. Thankfully Amber was there.

“Sis, I found a ride home. So I’ll just see you there.” I say, keeping it brief so she can’t take in my ruined make-up. I turn on my heel and walk towards the back of the school. My heart is beating a thousand miles a minute as I spot Chris’ car and see him leaning against the passenger side.

“You made it.” He says, opening my door.

When he hops in on his side I answer, “I didn’t know I had a choice.”

He just laughs, and we pull out of the school lot. _I can’t believe I am really doing this!_

Just then a thought occurs to me, “Where are you taking me?”

“Oh, just this place…” He answers, not looking at me. “It’s not far.”

I shrug and sit back, watching the roads pass by. Soon he turns on one, and then another, and then we are on a lonely dirt road and I am totally turned around. I start to panic, thinking this would be the end for me… He was going to kill me. Chris turned the car engine off and I snapped out of my silly fears to see we were at a lake, completely surrounded by trees. It was so gorgeous and peaceful.
“Wow, Chris, this is amazing,” I say while getting out of the car.
“I know. I come here every time I just need to cool off.” He says, looking into the water.
“Common,” he says and I follow him to the water.
He takes his shirt off. What?
“What are you doing?”
“Well you can’t just let all this water stay and waste!” He says laughing.
He walks towards a tree and pulls down a rope. He grins and points the end of the rope to me. I try not to be spell-bound by his six pack and amazing muscles.
“Oh no, oh no no no,” I say and take a step back.
“Oh yes you will. Common it will be fun! The only thing that will happen is you will get wet.” He smiles.
“Ok, fine I will do it,” I come over to him and take the rope.
I stand there for a minute staring at the water. Should I really do this?
I feel a push from behind, “just do it.”
I Push off and feel the wind in my face as I swing in the air. Letting go, I plunge into the water. I swim up with a smile on my face.
“See I told you it was fun!” He says with a smile, “All right, here I come!”
I move out of the way and watch him fly into the water. He does a cannon ball before hitting the water and Splashes me hard. He comes up and we both laugh. He splashes me with some water.
“Hey!” I laugh and splash him.
“Ooo! Now you’re going to get it!” He says with a laugh and comes over to me.
He grabs me and throws me into the air and back into the water. I swim up and laugh so more.
After splashing him until I am really tired, I swim back and lay out onto the grass. He comes out and lies down next to me. Silence came, but it was a very comfortable silence. We just stare up into the clouds, and smiles are on both of our faces.When it seemed to be getting late, I stood up.
“I should probably get home before my parents do.”
“Ok, sure.” He says and stands.
He takes my hand and leads me to the car. We both get in and he turns on some rock. We drive off and there is silence again. I am comfortable with it because I feel happy. “Gotta be somebody” by Nickelback comes on. Chris turns it up.
“I love this song!” He says in excitement.
“Me too!” I say back.
“This time, I wonder what it feels like,” He starts to sing
“To find the one in this life, the one we all dream of,” I sing back.
We sing this song and continue to sing until we reach my house. He pulls into my driveway and brakes.
“I had a fun time thank you so much Chris,” I say in a sweet voice.
“Oh no problem at all,” He looks at me.
“Bye.”
“Bye.”
I get out of the car and wave to him as he drives off.
I take my key from my purse and unlock the front door. I step inside and immediately Amber is there.

“Who’s that?” She yells in hushed tones, glancing towards the kitchen to indicate that was where the boys were.

“Chris…” I say slowly, shifting uncomfortably.

“Hazel… You’re practically married!” Amber hisses. Suddenly, her face contorts. “Why are you wet?”

“Oh, err…” I say, desperately trying to find an excuse.

Unfortunately, Amber isn’t having difficulty and starts firing off questions, her voice rising after each one. “And what took you so long to get home? I was getting worried. I didn’t see you at your locker the rest of the day either. What did you do Hazel?”

Just then Edwin walks in from the kitchen, Ashton following close behind. Ashton moves immediately to Amber’s side, but Edwin hesitates a couple feet from me.

“Where were you during lunch today, Hazel? I thought Amber said we were in the same one?” Edwin says concern on his face.

I feel my blood begin to boil. How can he stand there and look so concerned for me, yet won’t get within a foot of me??

“I skipped okay? I went to this lake I found last summer and swam for a bit and then laid in the sun to relax. It was a hard morning.” I scream, then race up the stairs to my room. I realize as I close my door that I shouldn’t have had a ride to get to this lake and so obviously I wasn’t alone this afternoon.

There was a soft knock on my door. “Come in.” I call.

Surprisingly, Ashton stood in my doorway. He closes the door behind him again and walks right up to me.

“Listen.” He says, right in my face. “I know my cousin can be shy… but he is also hurting. I doubt he told you, but before our fathers told us about the two of you he had been in a relationship for almost 2 years. He’d planned on marrying her. I even went with him to pick out a ring. Don’t mess him up any more, Hazel. I’m warning you.”

I stare at him in utter disbelief. I watch as, with out another word, he leaves my room. I sit down on my bed. Edwin had specifically said there was no one before he came here… I flopped down and groaned. I felt extremely guilty now. What was I going to do?

I glance at my clock and realize Mom and Dad would be home in a little less then a half hour. I grab a pair of sweats and jump in the shower. At least by the time my parents were home I would have a plausible excuse as to why my hair was wet.

After my shower, I walk downstairs. Mom is finishing up dinner and Edwin is setting the table. He looks at me and stops. I can see hurt and sorrow in his eyes that I had never noticed before. What would it feel like to leave the one you love for someone else?

I shook the horrible feeling and smiled genuinely at Edwin. I wasn’t sure what Ashton had told Edwin about what he had said to me, but I figured Edwin would come to me when he was ready to talk. I walk to our counter and grab the napkins and silver ware, deciding to help Edwin.

We finish setting the table in silence. No one is talking besides Ashton and Amber murmuring softly to each other on the couch. I notice Amber looking our way a couple of times.

“Dinner is ready!” Mom calls, breaking the silence.

After dinner, I sit in my room listening to music. I hear a knock on the door.
“Come in,” I say
It’s Edwin. He stands at the door in silence.
“I just wanted to… I…” He stutters than swallows hard.
“It’s ok; I should’ve told you where I was going. It won’t happen again Edwin.”
“Thank you Hazel, but I wanted to talk to you about this commitment.”
“Oh ok.”
He comes closer to me and sits down on my bed. He talks avoiding contact.
“Now I know I haven’t really been there emotionally with you. I am sorry for that… I have been through… a lot and I just want you to know it was nothing you did. I also want to assure you I am committed to this marriage.”
“Thank you Edwin,” I say in my nicest voice possible.
“Hazel?” He looks at me with concentration. I have never seen this side of him.
“Yes?”
“Are you committed to this marriage?”
“Well ya, it’s not like I have a choice.”
“Good point,” He says with a hint of smile in agreement.
“Take all the time you need Edwin,” I say hoping he knows I am referring to his snail relationship pace.
“Thank you,” He leans in and kisses. Well it’s about time.He smiles, “Well, good night.”
“Good night”
He finally kissed me. I did not feel a thing. Well that is a problem. I feel even more sympathy for him, but sadness approaches. I am stuck with a guy have no feelings for when there is a guy standing right there, waiting for me to come to him. Chris is there. I think back to the amazing day I had with him and how much fun I had. I also think about that fact that Edwin would probably never come up with something like that.
I barely fall asleep because I am full of emotions. I am full of sympathy for Edwin. Anger and sadness for what I am stuck with. I also full of thinking about Chris. How happy he made me.